Friday night to Saturday morning until I flew out

I decided to go to bed early as I had to wake up early. It didn't work as I had planned or thought. I couldn't fall asleep until very very late and it was almost time to wake up. I was so tired when I reached the airport,  I thought of falling asleep in the plane and that also didn't work. And finding out how many places we had to go today, made the day even longer. It was nice to see everyone, but was a long day eating, sitting and talking.

Almost midnight and here we are at home, its a good feeling to be home. No matter where I was at, whom I was with and what I was doing, I had one thing in mind. how you disappeared again. Its so sad but its the truth.

Last Friday of the month May, and also Friday before the long weekend

I suppose whatever you plan and picture is something doesn't always happen, I am also tempted to say almost NEVER happens. My plan for this weekend was to celebrate together, a long weekend getaway in Duluth etc etc. I had the plan beautifully planned in my mind from weeks and today it feels weird how it has turned out to be and far far away of 9 hours and 40 minutes flights.

Everything happens for a reason and if its meant to be, it will happen no matter what, is my thought on things in life.

So, far today, I haven't done much. I am still sore from leg workout, I managed to get the walk done with Marina. I knew nothing much will happen today, and I should've just decided to fly out instead of waiting till tomorrow. I can pretty much say now "Oh Well".

I had my breakfast which is Protein shake with Avocado, 2 slices of leftover mangoes, a huge lief and water in it. For some reason, today it didnt fill my tummy. After that was time to make some whole wheat mari and also some cabbage with cauliflower. I used my brand new cookware set. The vegetable turned very good.

After the walk, I got hungry and ate with eggs. I am not sure, I am so hungry today over and over. I am ready to be with family.

Oh my god, its already Thursday

Its been four weeks since I am home and doing this thing. Definitely there are times, I feel like everything is hitting me at one time. I have however decided to focus on the positive things only.

I looked at the WFargo application, it shows a weird status, wondering why it is. Even Reewa thought the same, I was hoping to get an interview, I guess not. Strange as it is.

I am looking forward to the meetup at Target today. Hopefully it will be positive to get in. One thing I need to finish today is"Selenium 3.0, the Spec, and Onwards".

Obviously, it was just a normal Wednesday

Today is just a normal midweek Wednesday, nothing special other than the Interview. It went well, and now waiting for onsite interview. I hope I will be able to Automation as well, that's what I am interested to do. As my goal is to be an Automation Architect in the future.

I need to do a lot of work so that I can reach my goal. One thing is that today I couldn't attend the Selenium 3.0 Webinar and hope to watch the recorded version tomorrow.

So, around 3pm before I headed out to the gym, there was a loud knock on my door, which scared the heck out of me. I looked through that hole, didn't see anyone, which scared me more. No one spoke when I said, "Who is this?". I wasn't ready to open the door until I left for the gym. There was a box sitting outside my door. Oh my god, it was my new Calphalon Cookware Set.

Calphanon Non-stick Classic

Simple Calphalon is the set which I have been using for the past 6 years. So, I have loved it only thing I didn't like the coating wearing off and food getting stuck. I hope I will love Classic set even more as it has more stars review wise, even though the number of the people reviewed are less. I am a bit worried about the handle as it doesn't have rubber on them, hopefully they won't get hot.
 

Simply Calphalon

Tuesday is just another humid day, and I still have slight Sinus headache

Woke up, had smoothie, took shower. read some stuff, went for a walk with Marina and then home. I waited for the call, and it had to be rescheduled due to the bad reception.

Then I went to the library and then it was time for some food. Schezuan Green Beans and Fresh Shrimp Roll and chilled water, yes chilled water, not a chilled Beer.

Schezuan Green Beans and Fresh Shrimp Roll 

After that headed to gym haha...Workout was just okay, and met Melissa and we headed out together. Came home, made some salmon, green beans and was time to sit down.

Hope tomorrow will be a better day and will bring good things in life.

Monday May 23rd May

The day started out with a tiring feeling. Yet, I was able to do things. I managed to go walk with Marina, phone interview, spin class, get my Sunglass fixed, and talk on phone. Its almost 10 pm and I am a bit relief thinking, it was a good day overall I think.

Insurance call went okay, I am happy about that. I received the email reply with Archive blog URL and that was awesome. I wasn't expecting that all. So, overall I am happy with this Monday and I hope things will get better going forward.

I also talked to my parents and figured out the finger ring stuff, we have been talking about, the stone looks good. I hope I will like and it will bring some good things in life.

Fingers crossed, and hope for the best.

Just another Sunday and life goes on...

People around are very inconsiderate, they disturb neighbors at 2:30am, really ? And the disturbance keeps going on, and on and on. I live in a place where after 10am is quiet hours, which is normal for any good apartment complex.

I couldn't sleep till 4am or so, it wasn't fun. I thought of staying in bed till late, and there goes someone else yelling a kid's name over and over, it was loud, omg. Why me ? I had enough so I woke up and decided to eat something. I ate couple of cookies and it was time to get some grocery. Thank goodness they have Kale, which is what I needed for my smoothie. 

I came home, made the smoothie out of Kale, Avaocado, Mango, Cucumber and Water. It was a good combination as usual. I didn't buy any other fruit than Apple so, that was my option. After the smothie and a little bit of phone conversation with parents, it was time to clean the fridge. I haven't cleaned it for a while, it wasn't dirty but here and there fruit, veggie crumbs. So, after the fridge was ceiling fan and then kitchen floor. I felt good with all those. 

Around noon, I went for a walk, it was warm, actually warmer than I like. No one to walk with, thinking about stuff, I did the walk may be few miles, then was time to head to the apartment gym and do some strength workout and knee exercise. All went went, and it was time for some food. While listening to the music, I managed to sit down calmly in my Ikea Poang Chair as well. 

The necessary things about life, the thoughts and how I miss the beautiful things about life together.

In the evening, hung out with a friend and her family. and it made me feel good. First Grilling of this season and it was beautiful in the Rooftop.

- Shrimp, Mushroom, Red Onion, Yellow Bell Pepper skew
- Zuchhini
- Red Bell Pepper
- Rainbow Trout
- Chicken
- Corn

This mind, which doesn't stop thinking about different stuff

Mind is crazy, it can think about so many good things and at times, it can think of things you do not want it to, and yet you can't control it. It gets hard the most when you want to stop thinking about something and the thought keeps running and running, over and over in your mind. You start to sometimes feel miserable with it, you tell yourself, omg please get out of my mind. Don't bother me please please.

So, that's when I can't help and I start writing here whatever it is. I let the fingers type whatever it wants to and this is how I let my mind release all my feelings, all those unnecessary thoughts. Last night, once again I had the hard time with sleep. I had some thoughts which wouldn't go away at all. I woke up with a massive headache for the second day in a row.

I was awake from too early, when I didn't have to be. I couln't sleep, couldn't stop thinking so I finally said to myself, get up. I woke up, too shower, too steam and headache felt a bit better. Then it was time to get ready and head to the Meditation Center. It was a waste of time, complete waste of time. I haven't never felt like getting out of a place that badly like today.

I decided to go to the Vietnamese Temple as its Buddha Jayanti, I reached there, sat there for a few minutes, tried to get some peace in my mind. As I sad there something happened to me, I couldn't control myself, I found myself dropping t_ _ _ _, it was strange.

I got back to my car and same thing happened, I couldn't control. Finally, I decided to come and make something to eat and sit down and watch tv. Its nice and warm outside, I am just here sitting in front of the TV, typing this entry.

Upon Upgrading Selenium WebDriver, no browsers launching

Omg it was one of the painful things I have experienced so far with WebDriver. Google, SeleniumGroups, stackflow and so much of so many things and no help. 

After so many hours of troubleshooting, I have figured out the issue and now all my browsers are laucnhing. I still see the "local connecting only" in IE and Chrome, but I can live with it as the browsers are launching.

What did I do to fix ?
- I cleared all the Cache under C:\Users\AppData\Local\Temp

 

Chrome and IE

org.openqa.selenium.WebDriverException: Unable to bind to locking port 7054 within 45000 ms

Build info: version: '2.8.0', revision: '14056', time: '2011-10-06 12:42:36'

System info: os.name: 'Windows 8.1', os.arch: 'amd64', os.version: '6.3', java.version: '1.8.0_45'

Driver info: driver.version: FirefoxDriver

ChromeDriver -  In Eclipse IDE Console, I see the following error  

[2016-05-18 14:55:22,554]DEBUG     0[main] - org.apache.http.impl.conn.tsccm.ThreadSafeClientConnManager.closeIdleConnections(ThreadSafeClientConnManager.java:324) - Closing connections idle longer than 100 MILLISECONDS

[2016-05-18 14:55:22,557]DEBUG     3[main] - org.apache.http.impl.conn.tsccm.ConnPoolByRoute.closeIdleConnections(ConnPoolByRoute.java:718) - Closing connections idle longer than 100 MILLISECONDS

"only local connections are allowed

Task Manager displayed, there were multiple instances of ChromeDriver.exe running. I killed all those and restarted, but same result. 

Firefox

When I try to run the test using Firefox, it looks like the browser might launch but after 30 sec or so, I see an error. The error kept indicating the some sort of locking error.

Happiness is a Serious Problem by Dennis Prager

One of my very good friends suggested, I read this book and sent me. The title of the book seemed interesting and so were the reviews. The cover of the book indicates its a The National Bookseller.

I started reading this book and I wanted to finish soon. I was able to finish the book tonight. The book is interesting yes, and the author Dennis pretty much talks about our daily life stuffs which sometimes we overlook. I recommend this book to anyone, who likes reading, definitely worth it.

I need to re-read "The Goal: A Process of Ongoing Improvement" from Eliyahu Goldratt, as his books are really good.

The Goal: A Process of Ongoing Improvement
It's Not Luck
Isn't it obvious
Critical Chain
Theory of Constraints

I think, I have yet to read the books below
The Race
Necessary But not Sufficient
Late night Discussions

Its strange how one thing can change how you feel..

Today I woke up with a bad dream, made me feel strange and feltl like, reminded me of something missing in life. Sadly, the exciting thing seems to have died, I don't feel excited about anything anymore. Thinking about things, at times makes me drop tears, feel low, how these few weeks have changed things in life.

Regardless of how I am feeling, I am making every effort to get to the gym. I don't have much interest to cook or eat either, but workout for sure I do. Today was a Tabata Workout, it was a good. With my aching knee, I wanted to do a low impact stuff and I was able to.

I came home after the class, took shower and ate something. As the time passed, I started feeling a bit frustrated and low maybe. I talked to you and that just didn't help. I started thinking how things have changed, how much exciting those days were, we were happy, joking, teasing and now there's nothing like that left anymore. Within a few months, we went from exciting, happy stuff to now this way.

I still hope things will turn in the right direction and everything will all be alright. Life maybe showing you the hard time separately.

Another day goes by without a call not even a single word message

Now what are you supposed to think ? Internet is not there, but the phone is there right. I am speechless as to what to say or write about it. I guess people just change overnight, or maybe that's how they have been but have just been pretending to be nice, honest etc. Within a week and within just few days, how things have changed. How we went from talking so much to not even a single word. Its sad to think, how it has turned out to be.

Disappearing is one thing, I really hate. People act like they care, and everything else, in reality, it didn't have a meaning, meant nothing.

Life keeps playing a game with me over and over

I don't know why life keeps doing this to me. For a change, I like someone, and everything else was starting to get so much fun. And now how things have changed. I keep asking myself, was that all real ? or just a long play for a short time ? Its sad how things are and hurts from deep down, how I felt and how I feel now. The whole thing is just basically sad.

I find myself, feeling okay at time, sometimes so low. I was happy thinking with the beginning of Spring, so many flowers blooming outside in the trees and plants. There is something nice blooming too, but it may have been just a wish and dream, maybe things were never meant to be. Again, coming back to thinking about things, the same word 'sad' comes to my mind and heart.

Today I got my workout done by 11am, and I am glad about that. I have learned some things by going over this course too. No matter what, there is a sense of sadness, loneliness sorta bothering me deep inside. Weekend comes and goes, its normal, its just like any other day.

People plan so much things to do with friends and family, here I am writing this sad entry. I find myself sometimes this way and today is that one day. Weekend is here, with how things have been, it doesn't matter whether its any weekday or a weekend. Hopefully something positive will happen soon.

At least I hung out with a friend and then we did our nails. I am not a Sally Hansen fan but this color is beautiful.

Love Rocks by Sally Hansen

Friday today, hung out with Pat my friend

All day, I spent on talking to recruiters, applying for different positions and it was finally time to make some food. And while frying some Salmon for the evening, I made something else unplanned.

Half of the salmon became Haku Choyela made of Salmon, looks great.

Salmon Haku Choyela

As for the evening, we sipped some wine, talked about life's ongoing things and soon it was time to bye.

Two weeks later, today is again the another Wednesday, a mid week

Normally this day, I would do Wednesday Workout but today I didn't even remember that anymore. Instead I was thinking and doing other important stuff. I did my laundry before heading out to walk, so one thing got done.

I had a good afternoon walk with Marina though. She asked me how things were and I couldn't tell her much good information. I shared with her, how I had felt the last week or so. She understood how I felt and she even said, I can understand, and that's good you did so. She was the only friend with me everyday, in my very bad times. And she reminded me that, its been almost 5 years, we have been walking in that hallway/lobby. So many memories, talks, pains, associated with that.

Around 5pm, I left for gym after talking to Shristi cha. We laughed about different things, cracked jokes etc as usual. I wanted to workout yet, I didn't. It was a good Body Works and Abs class though.

Today after a long time, I wanted to sing another song and upload.After coming home, I was sitting in front of the computer with my S5, singing and recording the video, my brother called. And we talked for good 40 minutes or so. The talk topic was something which we have been discussing from few days. Its a serious topic, I wish it was simpler but it is not. Now, after all workout, talk etc, I am not feeling sleepy yet and here I am typing this entry at almost 11pm at night.

Finally my video is uploaded in my channel, the video is blurr but, the song is nice I think. I would love to make a pro video one day.

What does honesty mean...

I trusted you, thought you are honest, you care etc.

After everything, you have said the past few days, I have come to realize, things you had said to me maybe were not true anymore. Your words indirectly told me "you can't get me ...... so it's your fault, I will do this and you shouldn't think about me" I thought you were telling me before, you are doing things for me and us.

After you didn't send me itinerary and even after me asking, I didn't know what to think. You made a face when I asked twice. I had to ask every details and after you didn't bother to write, when you were leaving, when you landed SEA, left or when you reached HI. What am I supposed to think?

Whole day waited, I finally wrote to you and your response was "just reached and settling in, will write later ". If you really cared, first thing, you would have done was, called to say "I have reached, will talk to you later". That would have made new feel better, unfortunately it's just me who's thinking that way. These might be little little things, but little things make difference, they also make you feel like, someone cares. 

I am disappointed and feel sad about the whole thing, I am telling myself to be strong,  it's hard especially when everything falls apart the same time. 

The sleepless nights and the constant uneasy stuff...

After a long time, it felt nice about somethings. I started dreaming and planning things in my mind and started to do things differently. Only to find out after few months, its nothing like how I had thought. Unfortunately, with other things, this is also not going well. I still wish, things will turn the right turn.

I couldn't sleep well again, been awake from 6am or before. I kept tossing in bed thinking about that 'one' thing. No matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. After two hours of struggle, I decided to getup and start doing some things. 

After talking to mom, dad and Nhas cha felt better, but I still have the thought in my mind, I wish I could just put a stop for now and not let it come in my mind again. 

The unusual circumstances causing all other issues

Today I did the bike ride with the ladies and it was pretty nice. We started at 1:30pm and got done about 3pm. It was a beautiful day and ride was pretty awesome.

First Ride approx miles Wayzata to Spring Park

Regardless of how I have been feeling, lunch with my friend turned out good

After shipping my SimplyCalphalon set for Warranty, I drove to WestEnd to meet a friend of mine. I and Mel hadn't met for almost 1.5 years now. It was nice to see her after so long. Bang Bang Shrimp Tacos and out chit chat made everything fun. The best part was, restaurant was so nice and quiet, made it more fun being there.

Blakemed Bang Bang Shrimp Tacos

After lunch, we stopped into CharmingCharlie for some jewelry, she purchased a necklace while I didn't find anything interesting. So, after that it was time to come home.

After few hours of sitting and reading through some technical page, had a short talk with my friend and his perspective made me feel better. After that was the real talk around 9pm, and it was painful for me. The other party had already made up mind, so it didn't matter to that person sadly. I wish things were different, easier and worked out the way, I thought it would

Life's unusual circumstances continues...

Its life, its supposed to be ups and downs. But, why does it always feels like downs in my life. Today's conversation made me sad, maybe its for good, but it seems like, it keeps happening to me.

A week later, that life's unusual circumstances...

I stand here today, fresh and relaxed. There are few stress stuff going on, yet I am not feeling like the way, I used to be. So, today I woke up and took the call I was expecting. After that, I was making some food, and talked to parents. As, I was talking to them, someone else called me, and that call went fine as well.

Now, its a waiting game for an email and moving forward part. I hope, we will move forward with it. So, around noon was time to go walk with Marina. We had a good talk and walk. After about 45 minutes walk, we decided to say bye and talked about walking Thursday.

So, I came home, sat down, I received few other calls, and emails. After all that was time for a video chat, yeah. I wish things were easier for us. Around 4pm, I decided to head to the gym and I made it to the Pilates, it was fine. After that I did Bootcamp, that was super nice. Its been a super long time, I did a class there and I felt stronger than ever.

On the way back, was time to stop into Target to pickup my glasses. I loved the glass box more than the glass itself. Haha....So, as I am nice and the ladies there are nice to me. Daphne gave me a sunglass box from DG which I can use as a clutch, omg Its a bit big for the bag, but its beautiful.

Dolce & Gabbana Lip Gloss

Then I came home and took shower. My dinner tonight was Guacamole, Cucumber, Strawberry and Celery. It was tasty and healthy, no doubt about that.

And here I am typing about my day.